


objects of interest

by aelandair



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Hux and The Great Tiddy Crisis, Kylo Ren's Magnificent Tids, Lego Star Wars Holiday Special, M/M, Masturbation, Nudity, is this crack is this serious you decide, what else is there to tag we all know why we're here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:48:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27609935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aelandair/pseuds/aelandair
Summary: Hux has seen Ren shirtless, and he can't stop thinking about it.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 44
Kudos: 122





	objects of interest

Hux stumbles out of the throne room feeling somewhat dazed. He is clutching his datapad in a deathgrip, gloves squeaking audibly, and his face is burning hot. The hallway is blissfully empty, so at least no one can see him stumbling around like he just saw a ghost. Or, well. Something far nicer and just as shocking.

He takes a deep breath, tries to compose himself. It isn’t becoming on a general of the First Order to be so flustered. It doesn’t matter that Ren’s chest looked… very broad, muscles on clear display, his pale skin marked by moles that Hux would very much like to touch, his pectorals looking honestly quite biteable… 

No. None of this nonsense. 

Hux shakes his head, as if that will make the images disappear, but it’s a futile effort. He’s pretty sure the sight of Ren’s bare upper body has burned itself into his memory, and he’s never going to get rid of it. Not that that’s entirely unpleasant. No, it’s actually quite the opposite. 

Hux  _ knew _ that Ren was built, of course. It’s impossible to miss, even when he hides his body behind those ratty robes of his. But his tall, wide frame, the way he fills out his clothes… well, Hux has noticed all of these things before. Has thought about them before in quite some detail, during boring meetings, staring at Ren on the bridge, or late at night, when he’s feeling particularly lonely and desperate. 

But his imagination could never have prepared him for the real thing. Mostly because he never thought he’d actually get to see the real thing. It isn’t like this between them. While Hux has, regrettably, found his thoughts occupied by Ren many times in the past, he is under no illusion about their relationship; nothing will ever come from it. Ren has never regarded him with that sort of interest. This makes it even more jarring, Hux thinks. That he got an eyeful of Ren’s chest and will now have to live with that forever, and with the knowledge that he will not get to see it again. 

Hux bites his lip. His breath is coming faster, and his body feels warm, and he is undeniably aroused. It’s almost embarrassing, how such a simple thing can reduce him to such a stuttering mess. He’s not sure how he’s ever going to face Ren again. There’s no way he can do it, no way he can be professional while he’s haunted by memories of Ren shirtless and his own pathetic attempts at keeping himself together.

Walking back towards his office does little to clear his head, and even as he sits down and tries to get some of his work done, he’s unable to concentrate. Every few lines, his eyes go unfocused, that damned sight coming to the forefront of his mind again. He can’t help but imagine, again and again, what Ren looked like. What he might have felt like. That thought nearly makes him choke, makes his face flame red again, and Hux stands abruptly, pushing his desk chair back and snatching up his datapad before he leaves his office with hurried steps. He’s not getting any work done anyway. 

Part of him wants to go back to the throne room and shout at Ren. What is he even thinking, sitting around shirtless in the middle of the day? When anyone might walk in at any minute? What if another officer had caught him like this? What were they supposed to  _ think _ ? This is no way for the Supreme Leader to behave. And why did he have to get so close to Hux, invading his personal space so inappropriately? Who  _ does _ that? People like Ren, apparently, who have no problem shoving their chests into unsuspecting people’s faces. 

Hux marches through the ship’s hallways with such determined steps that the few officers he encounters jump out of his way as fast as possible. Good. He isn’t in the mood to talk to any of them. He just needs to be alone. 

The walk to his quarters feels ten times longer than it usually does, and by the time he arrives, he is out of breath for more than one reason. He throws his datapad onto his couch carelessly, scaring Millicent away, and he feels bad about it for a brief moment before his thoughts are taken over by Ren again and he lets out a frustrated whimper. 

There is heat coiling in his gut, and already Hux feels like he can barely hold back. The relief of finally being alone makes him sigh, makes his shoulders slump slightly. Now that he is in the safety of his own quarters, it is as if he has lost all control over his mind, swirling images of pale skin and muscle making him dizzy. 

Fucking Ren. Absolutely impossible, strutting around and showing off like that. Really, Hux is absolutely not to blame for what he is about to do. This is entirely Ren’s fault. 

Hux leans back against the closed door, closing his eyes, and pulls his gloves off hastily, letting them fall to the floor. Usually, he wouldn’t treat his belongings like this. Usually, he would at least make his way to the bedroom before letting his fingers dance gently over his crotch. But this is an entirely extraordinary situation, and so Hux hisses at the soft touch and opens up his pants as fast as he can, shoving them down with his underwear and gripping his cock roughly. 

He hisses as he wraps his hand around himself, the memory of Ren, shirtless, making him harden quickly. It’s a relief to be able to touch himself, finally. He’s been pent up since he stepped inside that throne room a few hours ago. It feels like he’s doing something forbidden, something illicit, touching himself while thinking of Ren, but, well. It isn’t the first time he’s doing this, and he’s not going to start feeling bad about it now. 

Stroking his length slowly and bringing himself to full hardness, Hux lets himself relax back against the door. With his eyes closed, it’s easy to conjure the images up again in his head, to make up entirely new ones. 

He imagines what could have happened if he hadn't acted like such a fool back there, what could have happened if things were different between them. In a different world, maybe Hux would have looked Ren over, making his interest obvious, and licked his lips, smirked. 

"Are you trying to impress me, Supreme Leader?" he would have asked, raising a brow. 

Ren would have blushed, maybe, and nodded, smirking back at him. 

"Is it working?" 

Cheeky as always. 

Hux would have rolled his eyes at Ren, shaking his head in mock exasperation. 

"Maybe," he would have said, and it would have been a lie, because he was very impressed. Ren is simply so  _ big _ . It shouldn't be allowed. 

Ren would have stepped even closer then, maybe pushed his chest out some more, enjoying the way Hux was blatantly staring at his body. 

"Do you like what you see, General?" 

And Hux would have grinned at him and said yes, and then he would have reached out to touch, following Ren's clear invitation.

Hux groans as he tightens his grip, spreading precome over the tip of his cock and easing his strokes. He imagines running his fingers over the defined muscles of Ren's upper body, feeling how smooth his skin is, interspersed by bumpy scar tissue. Ren would be warm to the touch, and he would shiver under Hux's gentle administration, letting him go as slow or as fast as he pleases.

Hux imagines gripping Ren's pectorals in his hand, kneading the ample flesh, enjoying the way it would make Ren squirm. In his fantasy, Ren is sensitive and responsive, his skin flushing easily, from his face all the way down to his chest, such a lovely pink colour. Ren's breath would catch in his throat as Hux thumbs a nipple, and that would only spur him on, make him pinch and tug at the little nubs until they'd be red and swollen. 

The thought of that makes Hux speed up his strokes, desperation already making him sloppy. He is panting, his legs feeling weak, and he can't stop thinking about Ren. He wonders what it would be like to lean in and taste Ren, run his tongue over his nipples languidly. Would Ren's skin taste like the non-regulation bath products Hux has smelled on him sometimes in the past, warm and woodsy? Or would he taste like leather and ash and sweat, like a battlefield and victory and strength? Maybe he'd just taste like soap, or like nothing at all. It doesn't matter. Hux would enjoy it anyway. 

His imagination takes him even further, painting a picture of Ren spread out on his bed, face flushed and hair ruffled, chest bitten red and covered in bruises. Hux, sitting above him, smirking, satisfied. Then, straddling Ren's chest and placing his aching cock in the valley between Ren's pectorals. It's absolutely debauched, just imaging the way he'd hold onto Ren's chest, press his pecs together. He'd rut against him until the pleasure would dart through him and eliminate all thought, spilling his release all over Ren. 

A strangled whine escapes Hux's throat. He can see it clearly; sticky come spread all over Ren's chest, up to his neck and his chin, and how needy and desperate he would be after. And fuck, he'd love to get Ren off, and he's absolutely certain that he must be big, it's impossible not to think about it with these tight pants he's wearing all the time, and Ren would look like the incarnation of sin, spread out on Hux's bed like this, all big and strong and  _ naked _ -

That's all it takes to send him over the edge. Hux comes all over his hand, his climax hitting him so suddenly it takes him completely by surprise. He bites his lip so hard he can taste blood, and his hand is pumping rapidly, chasing that wave of pleasure, squeezing out every last drop. The high pitched mewling sound he makes sounds pathetic to his own ears, but he's past the point where he can do anything about it. 

When his muscles finally unclench, Hux slides down the door, legs too shaky to hold him up any longer. He collapses on the floor in a sweaty heap, accidentally smearing come on his uniform. He grimaces at the white spots on the dark fabric, then at the sticky mess covering his hand. The uniform is ruined anyway, so he wipes his hand on it, to get it at least somewhat cleaner. 

Slowly, very slowly, Hux starts coming back to himself. His sweat starts to cool, and with it, the shame sets in. It hits him, then, what he just did. How depraved he must be, to touch himself like this to thoughts of his superior. Though this is far from the first time he has jerked off while thinking about Ren, this feels like it's by far the most personal. Before, his fantasies were more abstract, but this… he isn't sure how to come back from this, or how to go forward. 

With a loud groan, Hux throws his head back against the door, dragging his unsullied hand through his hair. He is fucked. He is so utterly fucked. Though this little escapade has at least taken the edge off, he still can't stop thinking about Ren being shirtless. He doesn't think he'll ever be able to stop thinking about it. 

A sudden yowling sound rips him out of his messy, desperate thoughts. He opens his eyes, frowning. 

Millie is standing just a few steps away from him, peeking at him with her head tilted and her eyes wide. 

Hux feels his own eyes widen in shocked realization. She'd been in the room this whole time. Blood rushes to his cheeks, and he awkwardly clears his throat, tucking himself away and righting his pants a bit. 

"I am so sorry you had to witness that, my dear. I promise it will never happen again." 

She simply looks at him and meows.

***

A week later, Ren summons him to the throne room again. Hux feels jittery as soon as he receives the message. On his way there, he nearly gnaws his lips open, and clenches his fists so tight it hurts. He doesn’t think he can look Ren in the eye again. Not when he knows what he looks like under his clothes. Not after what he has  _ done. _

When he arrives, the door is locked. Hux frowns. This is unusual. Ren keeps the door to the throne room open most of the time, something Hux has chastised him about many times before, because that’s a security risk. Everyone could just walk in there and try to assassinate the Supreme Leader, and that would be a disaster Hux doesn’t have the patience to deal with. So far, Ren has waved him off every time he brought it up, said that he can take care of himself and that Hux shouldn’t worry about him so much. He says that last part with a smirk that makes Hux want to punch his pretty face every time. Hux sighs as he taps the control panel on the wall and requests entry. Maybe Ren finally decided to start listening to him. That would be a relief. 

The control panel blinks green almost immediately, the door opening with a soft  _ whoosh. _

"Supreme Leader," he starts before he is even properly inside, getting out his datapad. "I have the report that you asked for. If the supplier-" 

A few steps into the room, Hux stops dead in his tracks. The door closes behind him. He stares, shocked, mouth dropping open, eyes wide. His datapad slips through his fingers, hitting the floor with a loud clatter.

Hux doesn't even notice. 

He wouldn't notice if the Resistance attacked them in this moment.

His eyes are fixed on the sight before him, and everything else has faded away. His head is completely empty. There aren't any words left for him to stumble over. He can't believe he is seeing this.

Kylo Ren is sitting on his throne with his legs spread, completely naked. 

He's smirking at Hux, hand propping up his head, body relaxed, as if everything is absolutely normal.  _ Nothing _ is normal right now. Hux's brain is currently short circuiting, and he's trying to do something,  _ anything _ , but all he can think is  _ Ren is naked, Ren is naked, Ren is naked _ , repeated on loop. 

Then Ren stands up and steps closer to him, and Hux squeaks. It's probably the most undignified sound he has made in his life, but he can't help it. He also can't stop staring. His face starts to heat up rapidly, probably taking on a wholly unflattering shade of red. His heartbeat speeds up, and he starts sweating as his eyes sweep over the entirety of Ren's body. 

It's… truly a sight to behold. 

Of course, Ren's chest looks just as inviting as it did the last time, but now there is so much more skin to see. His strong, long legs, and his weirdly big feet, and his hips and abdomen, and, fuck, his cock, which is indeed big, and also half hard. 

Hux thinks he might faint. 

Ren comes to a stop, much too close to Hux, and Hux notices that his knees are suddenly very weak, and also that he is very aroused. He still can't say anything. He can only stare.

"Hux. I've been waiting for you. I wasn't sure you'd come," Ren says, and his smirk widens.

Hux whimpers; he doesn't miss the innuendo in Ren's words. This whole situation feels more unreal with every passing second, and Hux isn't sure if he wants to wake up or keep dreaming. 

He must still look at Ren with an expression of shock, and he still doesn't answer. Ren raises a brow at him, looking bemused, and steps even closer. Close enough that Hux could reach out and touch him. He swallows, throat suddenly dry. Ren's gaze follows the movement, and his eyes darken with something like hunger. He leans in, voice low and dangerous, making Hux shiver.

"Do you like what you see, General?"

And all Hux can do is nod. 

**Author's Note:**

> What a wonderful day for the Kylux fandom, right? Like Hux, I couldn't stop thinking about Kylo's tids, and this is the result.  
> If you would like to scream some more about Lego Kylux and the Tids or just scream in general, you can find me on [Twitter!](https://twitter.com/aelandair)


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